Today was a fun day of celebrations at work and daycare. We had heart-shaped pizza and gave each other "I appreciate" cards (in lieu of Valentine's) at work, and Rora's class had a party this afternoon. We both came home with big stacks of cards, candy and little gifts. Aurora was definitely feeling the love when I picked her up. She showed me her Valentine's then gave all her friends and teachers hugs while saying good bye!
Aurora does have sweet little friends and we like her school. But I have had one internal struggle lately about their programming. Now that she's in the 2-year old group, they're offering dance classes, but once you sign up it's an additional costume charge and monthly fee through September. They kicked off the dance season with a free class, and apparently Aurora had a great time, but I chose not to sign her up for it. I don't really like the idea of putting her in tutus and dance costumes this young, and it's not like the extra cost gives us a weekend or evening activity - it just happens during regular school hours, and I already pay (a lot) for daycare. So I didn't sign her up, but of course the other girls in her class ALL signed up. Their first class was Tuesday and she automatically thought she should be able to go with her friends and cried when they left her behind. She did fine hanging back with the boys, but I feel bad about it. I do love my sweet girl and will pay extra for her to take swim lessons this summer, but I just feel like I'd rather hold off on dance until the day she actually expresses interest in it. What would you do?
Okay, well Chuck's eating my candy and the Olympics opening ceremony is starting, so I'd better wrap this up. I doubt we'll do anything else for Valentine's Day, but if we do I'm sure you'll be the first to know!
16 comments:
I started dance classes when I was about 3 I believe and one of my biggest regrets is quitting at 10, but I probably expressed an interest in it from the time I could walk lol... considering I'm totally girly girl (which may not be Aurora's thing). AND it was also paid for by my great grandmother and we would go over to her house and eat dinner with her before class, so that was a plus. AND I think putting her in the class because everyone else is doing it, could be possibley starting the peer pressure way too early. : ) Do what you want to do, and she will be fine... especially if she hasn't expressed any sort of interest in it.
You have to do what you feel is right. If money is no option, I probably would have bowed in to the peer pressure and put her in the dance class. (But then I am a softy and spoiler when it comes to my grandkids. Grandmothers have that right.)
I guess it depends on whether she really wants it. Once she is put in the class, do you have the option of bowing out if she doesn't like it?
You might give it a trial run to see how it goes.
Also to consider, there may be a girl or two that cancels out of the class in a month or so. Then she would have some "girl" company.
Britt, I agree - it's like peer pressure! If it was an additional thing and we had a fun dinner first every week or something, that's one thing. I'd rather have her do dance or yoga on a weekend when I can go with her. Instead of paying extra for something that's during the day. Especially when she's this little.
I doubt anybody who signs up will stop mid-season. But some probably won't continue each year. I'm sure it's very fun for the girls, and Aurora will enjoy anything she does. But that doesn't mean she has to do EVERYTHING, does it? Harumph.
Lots of pre-schools do this type of thing. Some with tyquando, others with art, dance, and even special "pre-school" classes. They probably even pay a different instructor and get outfits and such. The nice thing is that she is taking dance and not having to go at 5:30 pm every Tuesday evening.
Sounds like she did show an interest, so let her do it. Not letting her do it is just showing her what your interest are, or are not as the case may be.
True-ish. But it's also over $100 for the costume and $56/month for 6-months (they go once a week for like an hour). And we already pay $975/month for daycare. So to me it seems a bit steep for a 21 month old. Am I totally wrong? Would you really have done that at that age for Lillie?
I mean... I'm not saying we CAN'T afford it, I'm saying I'd rather do something on weekends with that... yoga, the circus, Sesame Street LIVE, get a babysitter.
The price is about what a private dance class would charge...about what we paid for the years Lillie was in dance. Can't answer your question Amber, Lillie was the third kid and never went to daycare as I stayed home. Maybe a good compromise is to ask Aurora if she would rather do a weekend class or this class. She may just be able to know. It is true that kids shouldn't do everything always, but they don't need to be excluded on principal either.
It's definitely a tough call. I hate having her feel excluded. I think it's fine and sweet if she wants to take dance, gymnastics, music, swimming, soccer, t-ball... I just wish they just made all daycare activities universal, or offer extracurricular activities outside of regular hours. You know?
This is one of those things that would get me totally worked up and maybe even looking for a different daycare. Maren would then remind me that this really very small and you like the daycare and let her do it or don't and it really is fine either way.
Does Chuck have an opinion on the dance class issue?
If it's a choice between dance class and swim class, of course I would choose the swim class. I'm glad you want her to do the swim class when it's scheduled.
We just read this blog, and before we saw any of the comments, our reaction was "We agree with Amber. Asking a high extra cost for an in-daycare activity is a bit much." Amber, you went to a dance class when you were little, and we have cute pictures of you doing it, but you were a few years older than Aurora and you really wanted to do it. The moms had a good time talking during the class and it wasn't an arm and a leg. We're with you - too steep!
It appears that the daycare center is always finding ways to increase their income, like selling the awful "school photos" and now the dance lessons. And, the peer pressure helps insure their sales, especially to kids. I think the dance lessons should be included, with an ok charge for the dance outfits. Kudos on showing your concern to the school.
In the meantime, Aurora gets to play with the boys for a change of pace. I always liked that, LOL! What do the boys usually do during that time period?
However, if Aurora truly feels she is missing something by not being with her regular friends, and she really enjoys dance, then you may want to reconsider. Can she quit if she doesn't like it?
Amber I am sure she will be happy either way.
Personally I think the cost is a little outrageous personally.
Maybe you can find an afforable fun couple week, or weekend dance or tumbling class at a community center or parks and recreation for her to take.
I think it is a great lesson for her to learn at an early age, that you can't or don't have to do everything your friends do.
Kris, I agree - she'll be happy either way. Robin, once you pay enrollment fees and costume fees, there would be no reason to drop out. I'm sure she'd like it and be good at it - but the whole point of daycare is I'm not there, so I don't know how much she likes it, or what they're doing if they didn't enroll. But it's true - she won't always be able to do everything her friends are doing, and she won't always want to. For now, she's not even 2 yet and dance is just for fun. She gets plenty of learning and physical activities regardless.
Ok so I was the kid whose mother enrolled her in EVERYTHING: tap classes, horseback riding, summer camp, swim lessons, tennis, softball, etc. MOST of the stuff I hated, because I never felt like I had a choice in the matter, and most of it I never had an initial interest in on my own. However, of all the stuff my mom made me do, the one thing I always remembered was that I loved being with my friends. Aurora clearly has a good group of girlfriends, I'm sad she'd have to miss out on fun with them. But I also understand not wanting to cave.
I think that maybe you should just sign her up next time around. By next year (or next set of classes) she'll be even more aware of the choices she can make, and it might be easier to communicate with her about what she'd like to participate in and what she'd like to sit out from.
Either way, she'll still be her happy sweet Rooster self, and worst case: I can come over on the weekends and teach her to dance.
Boy, did you get a lot of comments on this one.
As much as I don't like to think of Aurora crying and being upset, there is an up side if you stick to the no dance class this season. She will learn that that she can't have everything and that life has its disappointments. I think that she gets enough love and attention that she will survive and continue to do well.
I support your decision, either way.
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